How to live a good life

James 3:13 - 4:3, 7-8a

What is a good life?  We have ideas of what a good life is or should be. Right now especially it seems to have something to do with being on the correct side of the issue, whatever the issue may be. And just as important as being correct is being seen as being correct.  It can be about vaccines, or policing in our cities, or climate change, or racism, or it can be about how your lawn looks, and what you’re putting into your body, and how well-behaved your kids are, and what kind of effort you put into maintaining friendships.  What it looks like to others is at least as important as what it actually is.  
Modern life is primarily a performative exercise.
 
But, James asks, what’s going on in your heart?  Is this so-called good life being lived with envy, resentment, self-centeredness, bragging, or bending the truth?  If so, then there will be disorder and wickedness of every kind.  If so, it’s not a very good life.
 
What is a good life, then, and how do we know how to live it?
 
For example: Is it ok to shop at the super convenient and cheap store that pays minimum wage and doesn’t provide their employees with health insurance?
 
 What about that place that pays great, delivers health insurance, treats employees well and donates to great causes, but the owner of the company invests his personal money in a fund that, among a number of other good things, also supports a cause that dehumanizes some people?  
 
Is it actually better for the environment to buy the toilet paper that is made from sugar cane and bamboo, if it comes encased in several layers of cardboard stuffed with (recycled) paper and is delivered to your door by a large gas guzzling vehicle? 
 
Is it ok to want to have nice things or go on nice vacations when there is so much poverty and inequity?  Do you volunteer enough? Speak out enough?  Keep your house tidy enough?  Spend enough time with your kids, or grandkids, or parents? Do you stay informed enough?  Exercise enough?  Pray enough?
 
Living toward a standard of a good life that isn’t even fixed or clear is exhausting.  Measuring that against how well other people seem to be doing it in order to figure out whether I am doing it right is downrightt mind-scrambling.  
 
In fact, disorder and wickedness of every kind result from this kind of selfish ambition and envy motivation.
 
I feel disordered frequently. I feel the desire to be seen as good that, if I am honest, is sometimes greater than the desire to actually be good.  
 
I feel jealousy or resentment rise in me on a regular basis.  I feel misunderstood and I lob misunderstanding right back at the opposing party.   I am often quick to judge and quick to anger.
 
If a good life has to include with what’s in my heart along with mastering some performative actions then I can’t even delude myself that it’s possible to live a good life.  There is no way I can live a good life.  I can try all I want, but it is never enough, and I do it for all the wrong reasons, and from all the wrong motivations.  And the striving and comparing and accusing voice of judgment against myself and others will never stop howling inside my head and often out my mouth.
 
What is a good life and how do we live it?  
If this scripture is prescriptive it hasn’t yet told us what to do.  Because trying not to be selfish or jealous, or striving to have perfect motives when we perform all of our lofty and moving-target good life actions, is not only stupid and impractical, it actually is impossible.
 
This is good news actually. We can’t actually live a good life. We can’t even figure out what a good life is half the time.  
But that’s not our job. 
 
Here’s where it this passage tells us what is our job, three things:
Submit yourself to God.
Resist the devil. 
And draw near to God.
Submit. Resist. Draw near.
 
Submit yourself to God, James says because all the conflicts and disputes come from the cravings at war within ourselves.  They come from the way we try to save ourselves, advance ourselves, preserve ourselves, present ourselves. 
 
But life is not actually not about belonging to ourselves, it’s about belonging to God, and through God to each other.  And in fact, God does a much better job of unconditional love and boundless acceptance than we could ever do for ourselves. So much so that when our lives are rooted in our belonging to God, we can be brave and open and connected to others.  So we are called to submit ourselves to God, to confess our selfish desires and admit our messy motives, and lay down our flimsy defenses and repent. We ask for the connection and hope that we desire, that we are made for.  
 
Then, instead of us trying to live a good life by whatever current standards and definitions we have embraced at the moment, the wisdom from above that is God’s wisdom, not ours, will live through us.  And our lives, the words we say and the actions we take, how we treat others, how we treat ourselves, what we do with our money and our time -  these things will become a good life. They will be done with gentleness, born of God’s wisdom.  
When God moves through us God draws us into lives that are peaceable and pure James says, and “willing to yield, full of mercy, without a trace of partiality or hypocrisy.”  But we don’t make that happen. We can’t.  We submit ourselves to God and the Holy Spirit does that work in us.  And the Holy Spirit draws us into God’s goodness already at work in the whole world, and we join in out of joy and calling, not out of urgency, pressure or guilt.
 
Second, we resist the devil – the Greek word is the accuser, the voice of condemnation and blame directed at our selves or others, the voice that that tears down our own humanity, or someone else’s.  That voice that says if we try harder and learn all the things, and avoid all the things, and do all the things, we can live a good life like those people obviously do. Or, look how awful they are, if we aren’t like them then we must be good.  That voice that tells us we are in it on our own, and we are supposed to be stronger than we are and not ask for help or admit weakness.  The voice that says we have nothing to offer someone else, nothing to give.  The voice that says that other people’s suffering or the problems in the world are not my business. The voice that says we have to carry it all and if we don’t it proves we don’t care.  We speak back to the voice of the accuser and stand up to it. We refuse to relinquish our minds and hearts to the delicious but poisonous, divisive anger of it.  When we confront the accusing voice, it will flee from us. 
 
And finally, third, we draw near to God.  We steep ourselves in what helps us seek God – meditation, walks in nature, stillness, stopping and stepping out of it all through gratitude, practicing noticing, and wonder, and cultivating silence.  We choose to spend time with those in need, and to care for each other, and we let ourselves be cared for and seen in our own need by others because right there is where we see God most.  We are human and present in our lives, because the God who became human in Christ is present to us here.  
Stop performing your life and live it, right here where God is.  Draw near to God and God will draw near to you.
 
This is a good life. 
Submit, resist, draw near.
 
I am more and more convinced that the way through this pandemic is to go deeper and simpler. Do less.  Listen more.  Turn things off and turn things down.  The noise and the conflict is a liar that tricks us into feeling alive but drains us of life. 
No matter what is happening around us or to us, we can live a good life.  God’s goodness is here for us, at any and every moment.
So submit to God and let God bring you into peace.  
Resist the accuser and it will flee. 
And draw near to God and God will draw near to you.
Amen.

The Game is False

Devotion for Being Apart -
September 27

I will share new devotions from time to time,
and invite you to browse through devotions that have been posted on this blog.

Today's scripture comes just after a rich landowner, who has followed all the religious rules, asks Jesus, What must I do to inherit eternal life? And Jesus tells him to sell everything he has and give the money to the poor and come follow him. Then Peter, seeing this, asks, Hey Jesus, we’ve given up everything to follow you, what will be our reward?  Jesus answers, "The Kingdom of Heaven is like a vineyard owner..."  Matthew 20:1-16.




Jesus’ parables are always designed to expose something about the way of fear and reveal something about the way of God. In the way of fear envy is at play – we envy others and desire to be envied.  Envy is an essential component, actually, a necessary part of the game.  We only know how good we have it or how far we’ve gotten, or how much we matter, if we compare ourselves with others and see where we rank.  

We want to know what we have to do to succeed, to be safe, to be good, to be secure. We figure that out by looking at others and seeing how we measure up. We’re better than some, but worse than others. It’s how the way of fear operates.
 
But in this parable the landowner pays everyone the same thing, no matter how long they work. Forget that they all start out equally in need – some worked all day, and some just a few minutes, and they all received the same thing.  And he made sure that they all knew it too, it wasn't a secret what he paid them. He set them up for envy and then broke the measuring stick. He refused to play the game.
 
The parable could just as easily have been about tragedy. When tragedy cherry picks– through accidents, or sickness, this one dies from covid, that one has no symptoms, these parents have a child with addiction or mental illness, that one’s kids are honor roll athletes – envy comes into play in a huge way. We feel relieved it isn’t us, or we wonder why it’s us and what we did wrong. 
 
But when tragedy is a hurricane that destroys the entire town, or a fire that wipes out the whole region, it doesn’t matter how nice our house was or how hard we worked, or how well we followed all the rules, all that we’ve invested is gone- whether that was a whole lot or nothing at all.  Now we are all equal – we all have nothing. The measuring stick is broken; everyone is out of the game.  (Of course, in real life we’d find other things to envy – like who has better home owner’s insurance, because inside the way of fear we can’t help comparing ourselves, searching for ways to save ourselves.) 
 
But in the way of God there are no comparisons, there is no way to gain an advantage over anyone else.  The reasons for envy disappear. We are all human beings, claimed and cared for by God.  We are all living by God’s grace.  We participate alongside each other and no one is better, or more deserving, worse, or less deserving than any other.  We are not paid by what we have earned; we are paid by the generosity of our God. 
 
This is bad news for when we think we think we’re doing pretty well comparatively speaking, when we’re convinced we’re secure or that we’ve succeeded. When the game is working for us, it sucks to be told it's pretend.  But this is good news when we have nothing to give, nothing to lose, nothing to compete with. The game is false. We are free.
 
We all belong equally to God and to each other, and every one of us is dependent on the generosity of our God.  All of us live in God’s grace. And God invites all of us to join in, no matter how much or little we think we have to give. And this God also makes sure we have what we need, no matter how much or little we think we’ve contributed to earning our keep.
            
I hope that this makes us brave.  We’ve got nothing to prove and nothing to earn.  In God’s Kingdom all people really are equal, each one valued, made in the image of God.  Every single one of us is loved by God completely, whether we think we deserve it or not. No matter our circumstances, each of us meant to share in God’s life and joy. And regardless of how much or little we may think we have to give, each of us is called join in God’s redemption and hope in the world. 

Amen.

(Go here for more on The Way of Fear and The Way of God).
 

CONNECTING RITUAL:

Perhaps tonight before we go to bed, whatever time that is in each of our homes, we can pray in this way, and so join our souls with each other and the people of the whole earth:

Envy and Gratitude - a mental, written, or praying exercise

Envy is the currency of the way of fear. Gratitude is the currency of the way of God. 

Envy tells us we are in it alone and against one another, and uses comparison as a way of measuring how well we are doing.  Gratitude recognizes we are all in it together and everything is a gift, and there is no measurement - it's all grace.  

It doesn't work just to try not to feel envy and to try to feel gratitude.  
But when envy arises we might be curious about it and acknowledge it, Oh, hello envy! There you are! Telling me I need to earn my place! I am envious because I am telling myself things would be better for me if...

We might turn toward gratitude by letting envy lead us there.  
The way of fear is telling me I need _____ to be (secure, happy, ok, good enough, successful, safe, etc).  
But here is my life, just as it is.
I know love through ______.
I feel joy when ______.
I am grateful for ______.
God cares (God, you care) for me through _____.
(Thank you).

This whole exercise can be done written, in our head, or as a prayer.