Thursday, June 25, 2020

Our Sabbath of Discomfort

Devotion for Being Apart -
June 25

This summer, I will share new devotions from time to time,
and invite you to browse through the many devotions that have been posted on this blog 
since March 16.
 




Matthew 6:33-34 says, "But strive first for the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. ‘So do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring worries of its own. Today’s trouble is enough for today."
Every pastor and church I know is doing the hard work of shifting mindsets right now, out of the pull-out-all-the-stops, short-term, full-throttled approach we took when we thought this thing would go on for a few weeks, to a settle-in-and-find-sustainable-ways-to-continue mentality.

One thing our session (church board) decided in May was to not even to discuss in-person gatherings in the church building until September 1. After thinking we should get a jumpstart on figuring some things out, we've decided that decision will remain.  
This is a long season.  We will know more then than we know now.  We don't have the energy to put to hypothetical scenarios--the concrete ones in front of us are where our energy is needed - "today's trouble is enough for today." 

It's tempting to begin making plans, but there is nothing to plan for yet.  In fact, this time of year, we usually begin planning for Fall. Our worship planning team takes a retreat to plot out the next year. We talk through Advent and Christmas, and sometimes we even get through Lent and Easter in our dreaming. Not this year.  Our ordinary church life is at a forced rest - we didn't choose it; it just came.  What we had has stopped, and we are living in what we have now.

We bought a VBS curriculum a couple weeks ago designed to use online, so that we could create our own all-ages VBS together in this time. But friends, I can't lead that. And nobody on session feels called to lead it. So unless someone in the congregation steps up and says, “I really want to lead this!” - it should not happen right now. (The VBS curriculum won't expire. It can be used ANY time, in a variety of ways, even completely in-person!).  It seems perhaps don’t have energy for more than what we are doing right now. Pulling back and slowing down seems to be what people are needing. And it's what we're getting too, if we can let ourselves receive it.
 
Our congregation talks about sabbath, and learns about sabbath, and have practiced sabbath in some specific, defined ways.  But sometimes we are given a sabbath.  And perhaps right now we are meeting a need for sabbath. 
There will be a chapter after this one.  But we don’t know what it will look like or what new calling and energy will come for that.  It’s ok to live in this chapter fully, which is a week-to-week kind of existence for us all.

This is a time of sitting in discomfort. Discomfort is so uncomfortable. 
Who wants to be uncomfortable? We want to avoid or escape it.  We want to plan ahead, and to fix what's broken with everything around us right now.  Or we want to numb and tune out the discomfort with alcohol, drugs, television, video games, food, or obsessing about the people who refuse to wear masks.

But what if we didn't try to avoid or escape our sabbath of discomfort? What if we stayed right here?  What if we accepted that this is a season for sitting in discomfort.  The discomfort of limitations in where we can go and what we can do. The discomfort of facing our history and our own complicity in systemic dehumanization. The discomfort of not being able to live like the ever-future-oriented modern people we are.  The discomfort of living these awkward pandemic routines we didn't choose, for far longer than we thought we would be.  This is a season for staying here.

There is richness in allowing ourselves to be uncomfortable.  We let things germinate and heal and grow.  Even in the discomfort, this pulled-back and slowed-down pace is doing deep sabbath work in us.  It helps us to rest from what has been, and it prepares us for what will be. This is a time to stay attentive to the moment, and reflective as we do so.

I have written something like 100 devotions since pandemic life began. I first committed to writing one every day, and did that for months, then 4-5 times a week. I am pulling back from that. I will write when I have something new to say.  And I will share some of what I've already written, or point you to where they are stored on my blog, because I am finding it helpful to circle back and reread some of the work we've done earlier in this season of covid - things like learning to listen to our needs  and how it's ok to not be happy, and how every day we are making really hard choices about things that used to be simple and require no decisions at all, and how there is always grace enough for what is, not for what might be.

Sabbath is rarely comfortable. (We already knew that).  But it's good. (We know that too). Staying in the discomfort of the moment is our sabbath task right now. "God is doing something here and now that incorporates the past and will lead us into the future," remember? Let's live the season we are in.

We can do this.
 


CONNECTING RITUAL:
 
Perhaps tonight before bed, whatever time that is in each of our homes, we can pray in this way, and so join our souls with each other and the people of the whole earth:

Matthew 6:33-34 says, "But strive first for the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. ‘So do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring worries of its own. Today’s trouble is enough for today."

Seek ye first the Kingdom of God
and God's righteousness
and all these things will be added unto you
Allelu, Alleluia.
Ask and it shall be given unto you
Seek and ye shall find
Knock and the door shall be opened unto you
Allelu, Alleluia.


God, help me live today.
Help me trust today.
Help me be present today.
Help me seek you today.
Help me live this day - the one I have, right now.
Amen.

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