Milky Way Over Quiver Tree Forest by Florian Breuer |
I think it’s safe to say
we are all in shock.
Our hearts are so heavy
with grief, confusion and anger, for the suffering of families in Newtown,
Connecticut. And I want you to
know that all of these feelings are absolutely appropriate and welcome in this
place where we come together in the presence of God.
Their reality seems to
hover underneath everything else at the moment, and we are not sure what to do
with it. The sadness and horror can be paralyzing. And yet we cannot turn
away. Turning away would feel like abandoning them – not that we are
actually WITH them anyway. We’re just watching their nightmare from afar, glued
to every news story, every image, every facebook link, hovering in a state of
despair, hopelessness and dismay. What are we to do?
My sister yesterday was
observing that for the vast scope of history, even a hundred years ago, people
mostly only knew about what happened in their own community. If a tragedy
happened far away it could take days, sometimes weeks or months to find out
about it. Whatever tragedy you
encountered, was right near by.
Your neighbor’s house burns down, your pastor’s child dies, your town
floods.
Virtually everything that
happened, whether suffering or joy, could be shared. And you could always act. There was always something you could do. You could act on what the person near
you was experiencing. Their suffering was your burden, their joy was your
celebration. We are wired to live
like this, in the image of a God who made us for connection and even finally
plunged in and joined us in this life and death thing so that nothing we ever
suffered would be borne alone. We are meant to share life with each other, to
bear tragedy together.
So prayers were paired
with visits, homes rebuilt, casseroles delivered, side by side piecing back
together lives or simply sitting in the grief together and listening. We know how to act, we want, with
everything in us, to act when
something terrible happens to another human being. It is the normal response, the right response. It is the God-given,
human response. But how do we act
when people are far away and we do not know them? Where does our compassion and
our sadness go? How do we join suffering when it is reported to us in a
continual feed of information, disconnected from real lives, real voices and
faces and friends? When there is
no ride you can offer or meal you can bring or night you can pass hand in hand
in grief and prayer?
Our passage today
is the newly pregnant Mary, fresh from the angel’s pronouncement. Still absorbing what all this
will mean for her, she leaves home and heads out to visit the six month
pregnant Elizabeth. Both
women have been given this enormous awareness, the weight of a promise that the
world is going to change, that God is going to come and do something
irreversible to save us all.
But they cannot
carry this weight alone.
None of us can
carry the weight alone.
And so they find
each other.
Before Mary came,
Elizabeth had told no one about the impossible baby growing inside of her and
hadn’t set foot out of the house. She believed God’s promise, had seen and felt
the changes in her own body as this child grew. She had every reason to go and
proclaim it to anyone who would listen. But she couldn’t bring herself to leave
the front door.
But now, here
comes Mary, who knows and shares the secret, who is also vulnerable and chosen,
who is also participating with God.
And when
Elizabeth sees her, the baby in her womb leaps for joy, and Mary, at being
greeted by Elizabeth, recognized as the chosen one of God, bursts out in a song
of joy and thanksgiving for the God who sees and saves and calls and redeems.
And now they have
each other.
Together they
bear the weight of the world and the promise of God, living side by side until
Elizabeth is ready to deliver.
In one another,
God provides sanctuary, and space for the promise to grow, to shape them into
people who could face what was to come.
And with one another they could be
reminded of the bigger picture, could imagine together the future God was unfolding,
could literally see in each other what God was doing for the future of the
world. They were given to each
other to share together in this promise of God. To bear the weight of it together.
Christmas says that God in
Jesus Christ came into real life, into people’s real lives, in a real time and
place, embodied in flesh and blood and experiences. And we meet Christ
who shared life with us and bore death for us, when we share life and bear
death with one another, in our real time and place. We are called to live
fully with the people to whom we’ve been given, the people who are given to us.
I cannot do that with
people in Newtown, Connecticut. I don’t know anyone there. I have never been
there. It might as well be a horror movie, a nightmare looping in the
background of my life, for as much as it impacts my own world.
But I know teachers who
must regularly run classroom drills with their students against such a terrible
occurrence ever happening on their watch.
And I know people who struggle with mental illness, gripped by
instability and frightening bouts with darkness.
I know family members who feel helpless and heartbroken that
they cannot change the choices someone they love has made.
And I know people whose child or spouse
was taken from them suddenly and unfairly, or who are staring down the barrel
of terminal cancer, or battling a life-stealing illness.
I have a friend whose
adopted daughter has been delayed in Haiti, and every day for over a year now
my friend waits to hold her little girl once again in her arms, as she gets
older and older in an orphanage waiting for the red tape to clear.
There is suffering in my neighborhood,
my church, my family. As much as I long to, I can’t share the suffering in
Newtown, but I can share the suffering of those God has given me to, and to
whom I have been given.
And I can trust that these
people in this tragedy have been given by God to people as well, that these
families have communities, have churches, have neighbors and loved ones who are
right there, bearing their suffering along with them. Who have voices those
people can hear, and arms those people can fall into and weep. We can trust God with their care and
needs. And the thing we can do for them as much as anything is to love
and care for those around us, being human for them, with them, being
image-bearers of a life-sharing God, a force for hope and peace and joy in
whatever ways, and with whomever, I am able.
This is the week of Advent
we focus on Joy.
It feels
strange to talk about joy against the backdrop of such sorrow. But these things are not isolated and
separate in life. They touch, and
intermingle, and deepen one another.
Joy is a miraculous inbreaking of God – a moment where you touch
transcendence, or rather, transcendence touches you. And for a moment, if only a moment, you are complete, and
part of the completeness of things.
I heard the terrible news
Friday just before Maisy’s first sleepover ever. For Maisy, there was nothing,
nothing, as important in all the world, than this friend sharing this magical
evening with her. When they met on
the corner in mittens and boots, they burst out in excited greeting, and then
they walked home touching each other the whole time, as though this was too
good to be true and this friend might just disappear if they did not remain
tethered together. I watched them,
their faces alight as they eagerly discussed how their stuffed animals would
camp out in a tent next to them, and when I texted a photo of them to the
little girl’s mom, she responded, “Everything is broken. And this is
beautiful.”
When the girls got home
they arranged the bedroom, planned every moment of pajama wearing and teeth
brushing, and then the breathless time came to dress up, find jewelry and
shoes, and matching accessories, and prepare to come to the Christmas
Razzle.
All the way there they
talked about how they were two princesses going to a ball. And I was their coach driver. And every time I wanted to plunge back
into tears, to lose myself again in the grief and horror over what had just
happened in Newtown, I was inadvertently pulled into their story.
“Mommy, you have two
roles- you are our coach driver, and also you are the fairy godmother, which is
perfect because you already have a beautiful dress and make up on. Just pretend you have a wand, ok?”
“Ok honey,” I said,
looking in the rearview mirror at the rapturously content faces staring into
the starry night, already nearing their bedtimes as the evening was just
beginning. “I’ll pretend I have a wand.”
I took a deep breath and
continued, “We are almost at the ball, where may I drop you off, your
highnesses?” and they giggled with their heads together.
And for a moment, these sweet girls in
their reverie startled me into poignant gratitude, into joy so unexpected and
shocking that I could barely breathe for how holy and surprising it felt.
Life is so hard
sometimes. Being alive, tragedy
and heartbreak are inevitable and universal and sometimes powerful beyond
comprehension. But then there’s
these flashes of, of all things, joy, unforeseen and astonishing. And it sweeps in and alters the
landscape with its passing power. Joy is the surprise that satisfies and
completes. Our experiences of joy
in this life are momentary, fleeting, impermanent. They are both glimpses of the future, and a completion of
the past. They are the fulfillment we long for and recognize deep in our being
as things being right, being restored, being redeemed. A friend yesterday called joy moments,
“premembering” – they are remembering what is to come.
And as such, joy,
experiences of joy, moments of completion and fullness, and glimpses of God’s
completeness-, joy is powerful. It is
light piercing darkness, it is hope tasted, peace glimpsed. Joy anchors us in real, tangible
experiences transcendence in ordinary life. Joy gives us strength and courage to face the darkness, even
while highlighting just how dark it is against the light that shines.
We are people grounded in
time and space. We are embodied, in flesh and blood and experiences; we live in
one place, and exist in one time. As much as I long to and no matter what
I do, I cannot save anyone Newtown, Connecticut from suffering, or even truly
share it with them. Not even if I
watch the news every second of every day. But truth be told, I can’t even
save the very people I love most on earth from suffering. But I can be
with them. I can stand by them and share their suffering. I can share joy and
life with them, and that is being faithful.
Our lives are a gift. We
are given to each other – family, friends, communities, to share life with one
another. We are called to do that faithfully. To be faithful friends,
parents, brothers and sisters, faithful members of our communities and
responsible for the place we’ve been planted for this time in life.
Everywhere in the world right now, Newtown included, there are people standing
with other people, sharing suffering and joy, and that is the place God is
present. We are called to live faithfully where we are and God-with-us is
with us.
Yesterday, over and over,
I prayed for families in Newtown.
And I went online and sent some money to the National Coalition to stop
gun violence, because this kind of terror is unacceptable and I want it to
stop. But I also turned off my phone and headed to the Children’s Theatre with
my family for our annual Christmas tradition and enjoyed “How the Grinch Stole
Christmas” together. The Dalai Lama has said, “Every day, think as you wake up, today I am fortunate to be
alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it.” Last night I got to share an evening with the beloved souls I have
been given to share this fleeting gift of a life with. And that brought me joy.
Christmas still
comes. No matter what happens, and especially when we need it most of
all, God enters in. Advent invites
us to long for joy, and to try on the fullness, to choose to notice, embrace
and celebrate moments of joy, when lost things are found and relationships are
restored, when brokenness is healed or fears overcome, or the delight and
innocence of children’s wonder fill us with gratitude.
The light is has
come, the light is coming that’s going to change the whole world, and already
is, even when darkness is overwhelmingly dark. You and I carry this truth, but it is too big for us to
carry alone. We need others to carry it with us, to give each other strength,
to remind one another of the big picture and what God is doing for the future
of the world. What God is doing
right now. We need one another to
premember the joy. Together we
bear the weight of the world and the promise of God, together we say “Everything is broken. And this is
beautiful.”
The Lord is near. Do not worry about anything, but in
everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be
made known to God. Live
faithfully the life you’ve been given.
It’s not very long. Invest
in peace and point out hope. Love those around you. Bear their suffering. Share their
joy. Grieve when you need to, as
much as you need to, however you need to.
Rejoice when joy comes, unexpectedly into your life, let it wash over
you and fill you with gratitude. Pray for the world and live faithfully
in the time and place you have been planted. And
the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and
your minds in Christ Jesus.
Amen.
When we gathered in worship on Sunday, December 16, we also shared Praying in Times of Tragedy, as we came together to lift the needs of the world and our community in prayer.
1 comment:
Everything is broken. This is beautiful. God is faithful.
Kelli
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